Oh, those Russians!

(A contribution by William) 

To continue with 7aki’s theme of “work colleagues from hell”, I want to tell you about another of our co-workers.

Have you ever worked with a “computer expert” who really shouldn’t be allowed near computers? That’s this guy!

If there a process to be run, he will run the wrong version. If there is a report to be run, he will use the wrong database. If there is computer fix to be tested, he will use the live (i.e. non-test, real data) environment. He has managed to destroy two laptops (by spilling drinks, dropping them, etc.), and has been known to forget to bring his computer to work. His whole job revolves around his computer, and he can’t be bothered to bring it with him?!

His crowning achievement was last week, when he took it upon himself to test a trial version of a software program that is integral to our computer system. He not only used the live environment and overwrite the existing software, he cancelled the process half-way through (leaving us with neither version), and it looked like we had lost a substantial amount of client data.

But here’s the amazing part: his boss always covers for him! In fact, with last week’s debacle, he ended up working (from home) until 1:30am to fix the problem he caused, and his boss sent out an e-mail to the rest of the office commending him for his efforts!

Bob has a theory about all of this: he had originally given him the nickname “Joe Black” because he is like death to any computer system or program he touches. (In the film “Meet Joe Black”, Death took human form and used that name.) Maybe he REALLY IS Death, and is holding the boss’ family hostage for as long as he covers for Death’s mistakes. It is the only explanation we can come up with; maybe you readers have other theories?

By the way: It is too bad for 7aki that our Joe Black in no way resembles the movie version (i.e. Brad Pitt). Ours has questionable personal hygiene and a habit of standing uncomfortably close to her when she is seated at her desk, such that his crotch is in close proximity to her face . . . BLAUGH! . . . sorry, I just had to be ill for a moment.

I don't care WHO you are: if you put your crotch anywhere NEAR my face, you're going to have to adopt if you ever want children!

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9 Responses

  1. LOL @ Death and LMAO at 7aki’s ordeal!

    Do you think his boss would be so happy with his work that he’d book him a ticket to Punta Cana?

  2. Pretty fly for a white guy! William rules!

  3. poor people! why don’t you guys conspire against him and get him fired? on the hope they will hire a “Brad Pitt” to do the work.

  4. Ewww! Poor 7aki!

    You should work on getting rid of his boss first then! lol

  5. So hold on a minute… if the guy’s crotch is in close proximity to 7aki’s face…

    How short IS 7aki :P

  6. why did u assume she would be bothered by having his crotch so close to her face ?!
    I think that is the only logical conclusion i can deduce …
    damn it seems so much fun to work at ur place

  7. this is a typical case of Vitamine “W”!! or at least in Amman it would have been :s

  8. kj: tsk, tsk, how dare you imply that 7aki is of less than noble proportions?(grin) I did say “when she is seated at her desk.”

    no angel: trust me, it bothers her, and it bothers all of the other female staff when he does it to them. I won’t even let him near my desk . . .

    mariam: You originally stumped me with the “W” reference. A quick Google search later, the Urban Dictionary listed “Vitamin W” as “food from Wendy’s”, or “weed/marijuana”. While the Wendy’s reference is accurate (“I loves me a good Frosty!”) it seemed out of context, and the drug reference doesn’t seem to apply here. The next search result, however, gave me the Arabic version (WASTA), and I shudder at the possibility that there is someone of influence behind keeping him in the job!

  9. looool, I can’t believe that you found “Vitamin W” on the internet!!!

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