Rant | 7aki Fadi

On Coming Back to Work and Such

Posted on September 23, 2009 by 7aki Fadi

So I am back in the work force and it took me a record 3 days to realize that although I am excited to be back at work and that I missed it there is a list of things that I have not missed:

1) Committing every speeding violation to drop little 7aki off to the daycare and still make the train that would get me to work at a reasonable time because sauntering in at 9:30 and leaving at 4:00 is apparently “Not Kosher”.

I am pretending that this is my car

2) Still wanting to bitch slap the train riders. HELLOOOOO, news flash, I HAVE PERSONAL SPACE MOFOS, please don’t pretend that I am not sitting in front of you and your STUPID EFFING PURSE is touching my legs, move it Beeeatch.

.
And to you who are sitting next to me, NO , it’s not OK to keep moving your STUPID ELBOWS and touch me every once in a while.

.
And to you back pack carrier. Who , in this day and age, STILL carries a back pack? You are out of elementary school, you should upgrade to different kind of bag … but I digress. When you are walking to get to your seat please FOR THE LOVE OF GOD carry your back pack with your hand because honestly I don’t like to be smacked in the head with a MOFO back pack.

Everybody is invading my personal space

3) The crazies on the subway and street.
Need I say more.
There are LOTS OF THEM in down town Toronto for some reason. In the suburbs we truly live in a cocoon.

OMG there is a guy who looks EXACTLY like that, minus the detonator

4) You know what is sadder than all of the above? That at this point I hadn’t made it to work yet.

This is me when I reach work

5) I like the work part.

6) And then rinse and repeat all of the above in reverse order to get back home.

How I feel but instead of rocks there are trains, people and crazies falling on my head

Filed under: inhumane, Just Shoot Me, kill me now, Rant | 9 Comments »

A Mystery That Will Never Be Solved

Posted on September 13, 2009 by 7aki Fadi

This mystery has been plaguing me since I got married.

Well you see, before I got married I never did any laundry so I didn’t even know that this problem existed.

The mystery of the disappearing socks.

Seriously. When I collect the laundry MYSELF and wash it MYSELF and then dry it MYSELF why is there always at least one orphan sock that does not have a brother (or a sister)?

Where do those socks go? Seriously people, WHERE?

The only theory I can think of is that there is a sock black hole in the washer or dryer that sucks the socks into a different dimension, and that black hole takes the socks to these peoples washing machines where these people are wondering :” Where the heck did this sock come from?”.

You know what would be nice? If these people only had one foot because they would appreciate the mystery sock. If they had two feet then they would be like, WTF, why did I get this one stupid sock.

Despite this conundrum I always hold out hope of reuniting those orphans with their siblings and that’s why I established a sock orphanage where all those lonely mate-less socks reside in the hope of them being some day reunited with their siblings.

But the sad truth is that based on very reliable statistics the probability of those socks being reunited with their siblings is slim to none.

Filed under: bizzaro land, less-than-nothing, life, Mindless Crap, ramble, random, Rant | 21 Comments »

A Public Service Announcement

Posted on August 31, 2009 by 7aki Fadi

When you place a new toilet paper roll (and for all that’s holy in the world) it has to be over like so :

Goooooooooood

And not under like so:

Evil. BAD BAD BAD

End of public service announcement.

You are welcome.

Filed under: Just Shoot Me, less-than-nothing, Rant | 9 Comments »

The Difference Between Men and Women in the Middle Eastern (Arab) Blogsphere

Posted on August 6, 2009 by 7aki Fadi

It’s very interesting to observe the dynamics of the Middle Eastern blogsphere mainly the differences between the blogging styles of Arab men and women.

Lets talk about women first.

For Arab women to be able to completely express and protect themselves it feels like they have to blog anonymously since an Arab woman’s morals are judged by every single word that is uttered on her blog.

If a woman talks about going out with the girls (or guys) partying , dating, or even if a woman is married and talks about her marriage openly or what have you is harshly judged and criticized, called slut or immoral. Some people go as far as jumping on her blog like vultures jump on a dead carcass making it VERY rare that you see a blog written by an Arab female that tackles any of these subjects un-anonymously.

Now if a woman chooses to reveal her identity she sensors herself in fear of the socity and it’s pressures. And you will rarely see arab women sharing their pictures openly.

What contributes to Arab women bloggers censoring themselves is the “community feeling” in the Arab blogsheper due to the small number of bloggers in the Middle East which becomes even smaller when divided by country . The small number of bloggers makes the intrenet replicate our society.

It is really hard being an Arab woman on-line.

On the other hand Arab men are free to talk about their sexcapades and having a hangover and being so drunk and what happened at this club or that club and suddenly instead of it being a shame it is actually considered funny and they are applauded for their sense of humor and honesty.

One thing though in common between Arab men and women bloggers is political and religious self censorship; fear of the authorities in the first case and the wrath of the religious people in the second case.

So if you are trying to escape your society by blogging and writing you will find it duplicated on the Internet. If you express thoughts that are different or that are not acceptable then you will be shamed, criticized and shunned.

Honestly, thinking about the whole thing just depresses me.

What are your thoughts on the subject? How do we overcome this problem? When will we truly be able to express ourselves without being bullied or harassed?

Talk to me.

Filed under: 7aki mish fadi, blogging, Freedom, freedom of speech, Rant, Thought Provoking | 26 Comments »

The Day I Lost My Voice, My Eyeballs Melted and I Went Blind

Posted on March 31, 2009 by 7aki Fadi

Not figuratively but literally.

I have been fighting a cold for the last week. Usually this kind of cold would be like NOTHING but because I am the sole nourishment source for one kid and the sole entertainment source for the other it left me spent.

After I started feeling better yesterday , kablaaaaaaaam, I lost my voice , my voice comes and goes but it surly goes in the most inopportune times.

Like yesterday at the optometrist:

Dr: So tell me what do you see on the wall

Me: A, F, D, pshpshpshpshpsh (pshpshpshpshpsh means that I can’t speak above a whisper)

Dr: What was that?

Me: I said pshpshpshpshpsh

Dr: ?

Me: Waaaaaaaaaaa3333333.

Let me tell you about my appointment, it was like Chinese torture. For a whole hour I was whisked from one machine to the other until I felt like my eyeballs were going to fall out.

First I was interrogated about my health history. It took so long that I thought they were going to make me pee in a cup after. heheeeeeeeee.

After that it was the machine that would try to figure out how screwed my new prescription was, for anyone who knows what I am talking about it’s the machine with the little house at the end of the road.

Then the machine that would take a picture of the back of the eye ball. First you have to focus on looking forward on a little red dot and then, KABLAM a BLINDING flash , that leaves you …. well … blind… for like 30 seconds. They had to flash my eyes three times. THREE.

All that and I haven’t seen the doctor yet!!!!

Then I go to the doctor and the torture of : “Which lens, number one or number 2″ begins, I hate this part. It’s so stressful I hate it. If you say number 2 and then after you get the glasses it turns out to be number one. Waaaaaa33333.

After she figured out my prescription she then puts eye-drops in my eyes to check for glaucoma, the eye-drops are yellow ( ew) and I felt my eyeballs were going to melt I swear. It was a weird sensation I have never felt before.

I THOUGHT I was done but noooooooooooo, now they are going to check my peripheral vision, this was THE WORST part. Worse than the blinding flash and the eyeball melting drops.

First I had to wear an eye patch, a pirate eye patch. And that was the best part.

Then they put my head in this white sphere (ish) tunnel (ish) machine and I had to click a mouse every-time I saw a dot of light. Trust me after two minutes focusing forward with one eye you start seeing flashing lights everywhere. After the third minute of this torture I was just clicking away wether I saw lights or not.LOOOL. I had to repeat that for my other eye.

Finally after that I got waaaaaaaay cool new glasses.

And then my eyeballs fell out.

The End.

Filed under: adventure, biddi mama, ew, health, inhumane, Just Shoot Me, kill me now, life, me me me, Rant | 14 Comments »

OMG I Totally Forgot….

Posted on March 3, 2009 by 7aki Fadi

… to wish myself a happy birthday on my blog!!!

SO:

Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday to 7akiiiiiiii
Happy birthday to meeeeeeee

So baba 7aki got me wicked and I mean WICKED presentSSSSSSS ( stress on the s, hahahaha)

And my birthday was yesterday.

I am 33 years old. YIKES! How did the years fly like that people??? Like, seriously, I don’t understand how I am 33. And I hate odd numbers , they are kind of creepy don’t you think?

And I want the summer to come already, I am freezing my ass here. 25 BELOW zero today, WHY? What purpose does -25 serve, seriously.

OK so I was at the library last week, I am at the library a lot these days, at least once a week and sometimes twice a week and I saw Oprah’s 20th anniversary collection (6 DVD’s) so I borrowed it. And what a fucking bummer those DVD’s were. I wanted to sob while watching half of them.

Like what the hell man, there is crying by people and Oprah in half of the 6 DVD’s. And I am hormonal and a bit sleep deprived.

But they were good, really good, I never realized Oprah was sooo amazing, I always thought she was boring and OMG wanted her to get laid already, hehehehe, but she moved me. And you have to watch this collection.

If I am to take away anything from this collection it would be the one thing that struck me the most and stayed with me. It is the simple act of how you greet or look at your child. Always have a smile on your face when you look at your kid because at a young age children only see a happy loving face or a critical face which gets them to thinking” What did I do wrong now?” or ” My parents don’t love me”, which will cause them to have so much self doubt resulting in low self esteem.

But there is soooo much more, interviews with Nelson Mandela, which was amazing because his talk and resistance of apartheid reminded me of our peoples plight. Also Sidney Poitier who is such an inspiration and many more people.

I have to say, her 20 year collection is very inspiring. I never thought I would say that about Oprah but I kinda like her after watching this.

So if I had a dinner party and I could invite 4 people dead or alive I want to invite:

- Oprah, cos she is an icon and she likes to read just like me so it would be interesting to talk to her.
- King Husain. I heard he liked fried tomatoes ( gallayet bandora). He is such a charismatic person and was such a legend.
- Jon Stewart. He is soooooooooooo funny you gotta love him.
- Gerard Butler, because he’s hot. And every dinner table NEEDS hotness. LOOOOOOOL.

Who would you invite?

Filed under: Entertainment, Movie, Movie Review, non fiction, ramble, random, Rant | 18 Comments »

Why? Some Pointless Questions

Posted on February 26, 2009 by 7aki Fadi

1) When we store eggs why do we have to put the pointy side down?

2) How are diapers made? And what’s that super absorbent gel?

3) Why does baby breath smell soooo good? I swear it smells like vanilla or like sweetness and yummyness. I think we should bottle that smell, it could make any woman swoon. I think it’s the baby’s gums that add to the OMGodness, OMG the gums are soooooooooooooooooooooooooo awesome!!!!!! I love the gums, I can’t say enough about how much I LOVE THE TOOTHLESS GUMS. So help me God.

4) Why do I torture myself and stay up late after the kids go to sleep at night and suffer in the morning? I HATE ME …. sometimes.

5) Why are you reading this post?

6) Why is the sky blue? I always forget this piece of information, no matter how many times I look it up, I forget.

7) Why do bloggers say goodbye and say I am done with blogging forever and blah blah and then they come back? These people bore me, I mean, if you want to stop blogging you just do that, you stop. Like Hani, he just stopped, Hani, we miss you come back

8 ) Will I ever be able to live in an Arab country again? Especially Jordan?

9) Seriously. Why are you reading this post?

10) Why do I want to have another baby when my baby is only five months old? Peoples, I have the “I want to have a baby” fever and I HAVE A BABY already!!!! Maybe I’m a quintuplet Mom in the making?
But peanut is sooooooooo good peoples, and did I tell you her breath smells sweet and delicious?

11) Who is the MOFO who said women have to remove the hair on their bodies? Who started this MOFO trend? Well, if you find that person AKA MOFO tell them I said EF YOU, MOFO!!!!

12) Why do people, when they travel to a different country, go shopping although the place they live has the exact same stuff? It’s like vacation makes the money you have seem like monopoly money. So, why?

13) Why are we on this earth?
I think we are on this earth to smell babies sweet breath. Cos peoples, I tell you, it’s worth it. I am going to start a new religion. I’ll call it BSB HAHAHAHA

14) Is funk dead?

15) What is funk?

16) How do they sell liquid milk that is not refrigerated? How is it made? Does is scare you that it does not spoil outside of the fridge? Is it made of alien milk?

17) Why is cabin fever called cabin fever?

18) Why?

Filed under: 7aki mish fadi, baby, fa3es, less-than-nothing, life, Mindless Crap, Philosophy, ramble, random, Rant, thinking, Thought Provoking | 12 Comments »

Little 7aki Mistifies Me!

Posted on February 18, 2009 by 7aki Fadi

Little 7aki LOVES to eat the following:

1) Shrimp. Yes, shrimp. She would eat pounds of it if I let her.

2) Spinach. Which some adults don’ t even want to smell.

3) Brie cheese. Like , helloooooooo, who LIKES Brie cheese? Most people hate it. ( I love it)

4) Ask her what’s your favorite vegtable and she will answer in a heart beat: Cauliflower

But tell her to taste a tomatoe and she will look at it as if it was the devil.

Filed under: bizzaro land, fa3es, family, Food, Funny, health, life, Little 7aki, random, Rant, Thought Provoking | 11 Comments »

Why Kids These Days Think They Had It Hard

Posted on January 24, 2009 by 7aki Fadi

So yesterday I got this email and I posted it here (You have to read this first before you read this post), then one of the guys who got the email wrote this, and I was laughing soooo hard it is soooooooo funny:

Whatever, that’s nothing!
When I was young, I had to bend behind the computer and take the phone cord out of my phone and plug it into a modem. Do you have any idea how dusty it is behind a computer desk?!? Then I had to wait like 3 minutes while the Internet connected via slow dial-up connection. It would make all these crazy computer & static noises, it was horrible!

Oh, and we didn’t have these fancy MP3 players or IPODS…noooooooo, I had to burn a good old fashioned Compact Disc! I had to log onto Napster, which would take my damn dial-up Internet about 8 minutes to load. Then I had to search for songs, half of which were viruses! It would take like 2 hours to download one illegally-shared song! Then after downloading enough songs to make a CD, I would literally have to sit there and wait a good 30 minutes while my HP Home PC, Windows 98 Version would burn the CD.
These kids don’t know how good they have it these days!!

End Rant.

Filed under: computers, Funny, Hilarious, humor, life, Rant, technology | 8 Comments »

MOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Posted on October 24, 2008 by 7aki Fadi

GOT MILK?

Filed under: family, Mothering, ramble, random, Rant | 8 Comments »

I couldn’t have said it better myself

Posted on September 16, 2008 by 7aki Fadi

“I’m feeling very DONE, either way. My skin is stretched beyond insanity, my ribs feel bruised, the heartburn is unbearable (I get it from EVERYTHING, including WATER THAT IS TOO COLD), and I’ve started throwing up again. My clothes don’t fit, I’ve graduated to the uber-sexy nursing bras, and I’m already not sleeping. Bring it, baby. Let’s get the real party started.
I’ll provide the footwear.”
Source

Yup, EXACTLY how I feel but I am 37 weeks now, I am due on October 6th.

Peanut, GET OUT ALREADY!

In other news my mom is coming on Saturday, wooohooo, can’t wait. I havn’t seen her since July 2005. Imagine? So I can’t wait to see her and little 7aki can’t wait to see her.

I have been off for a couple of weeks now, I took my vacation time that I saved during the year and I am sooo glad I did, OMG I love not having to go to work.

Getting some things done here and there, cooking more healthy for the family instead of eating out and junky food so I am happy about that.

But honestly, the baby needs to come out. I no longer look like a cute soccer ball, I graduated to a blimp!

Yup, this is me.

Filed under: biddi mama, biddi my mother in law, family, health, Just Shoot Me, kill me now, life, pregnancy, Rant | 23 Comments »

I kissed a Girl And I Liked it!

Posted on September 3, 2008 by 7aki Fadi

Can someone PLEASE get this song out of my head???? It has the most stupid lyrics but I can’t stop signing along, if I hear it on the Radio or wherever I HAVE to sing along. Check it out.

And shhh don’t tell baba 7aki I told you but I caught him singing it the other day, HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA.

I told him: “DUDE, do you even realize the lyrics you are singing?” LMAO.

He was like : “Holy crap” He was shocked that he was singing it.

But to his defense, it is a very catchy tune, you can’t help but sing it!

At least he stopped singing: “I’m not a girl , not yet a woman” by Britney Spears. AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. LMAO.

He seriously needs to pay attention whenever he sings along, he just doesn’t listen to the lyrics. Hehehe

Filed under: Baba 7aki, Entertainment, family, Funny, Hilarious, humor, life, Music, music videos, random, Rant | 20 Comments »

A Future Glimpse: Jordanian Blogsphere Post Topics in Ramadan.

Posted on August 27, 2008 by 7aki Fadi

Here is a glimpse into the future to what the topics will be like on the Jordanian blog sphere during the holy month of Ramadan:

- Someone will complain that the people just fast and do nothing else like be angry and gossip and what not.

- Someone will complain: OMG why can’t people leave me the hell alone if I don’t want to fast? It’s a personal choice.

- Someone will complain about people wasting so much food in Ramadan , since when is Ramadan about eating? It’s about sacrifice and worshiping God.

- Someone will post Abu mahjoob caricature either protesting the prices in Ramadan, the gluttony of the people, or the state of the workforce during Ramadan.

- Someone will complain: Since when is Ramadan going for argeeleh and playing cards? What about worshiping God?

- Someone will post pictures of food (heheheh that would be actually welcome)

- Someone will complain about why do we need short hours in Ramadan and how the country goes in a stand still . BUT WHY? why can’t it be just a regular day?

- Someone will post about how people are obsessed with TV in Ramadan and maybe recap the musalsalat that are going on.

- Maioush will say: Il Roz lissa ma istawa. HAHAHAHAHAHA

- Then when Eid comes, someone will protest about the silliness of just visiting someone who was at your house 10 minutes ago and how they’re dying from the sweets and coffee they had to endure and how young couples escape to Aqaba or something.

- The ultimate post where someone will complain about all the above

So this basically covers almost anything that would be said about Ramadan and guess what, it already started.

Ramadan Mubarak Y’all

Filed under: Amman, jordan, ramadan, ramble, random, Rant | 26 Comments »

11632…

Posted on August 21, 2008 by 7aki Fadi

… minutes left to be at home. 8 days to be precise.

But, for today I am done, I am very very tired right this second, it’s only 2:15 and I think I will catch the next train home . I need to lay down. I have zero energy and a bit dizzy so I will go home and nap.

I really want my mommy .

Filed under: health, me me me, pregnancy, ramble, random, Rant | 5 Comments »

7aki Peanut Has Spunk!

Posted on June 10, 2008 by 7aki Fadi

So I was at the doctors yesterday checking up on 7aki Peanut .

It was time to check the baby’s pulse , every time the doctor tried to get the pulse Peanut would move away. After several tries the doctor finally had the monitor fixed on the pulse and he started counting the heart beat only for Peanut to kick the monitor so hard it bounced. LOL.

The doctor gave up, surprised he said : “Did you see how the baby kicked this thing ???”

Well, what can I say, when peanut does not want the pulse taken it will not be taken. You got spunk kid!

HAHAHAHAHA LMAO.

P.S. : 7aki peanut is one pound/ 500 grams and measures about 11.4 inches/ 29 centimeters from crown to heel.

So WHY HAVE I GAINED 18 pounds????? WHY??? WAAAAAAAAAAA333333333333333333

Filed under: fa3es, family, Funny, Hilarious, humor, pregnancy, Rant | 8 Comments »

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