Updated: The secret of a successful marriage is…

Update: Well this is great isn’t it???? A person can’t joke or have any sense of humour at all when sex is the subject. Or is it because I am a woman this subject becomes taboo and not acceptable? Gosh, maybe I lived in North America for too long…I tend to forget. … So typical of some people to judge and throw insults like that!

And NEWS FLASH … married people DO HAVE SEX.

Sex.

You angry at each other? Have angry sex
You happy? Have happy sex.
You get into a fight? Have makeup sex…it’s the BEST.

The only type of sex you should NEVER have is sad sex … ewww … because there is nothing more unattractive than crying before, during or after sex…3anjad ewwwww

Oh….. but Kinzi said it should be PG rated … OOOOOOOOOOOPS.

So let me start over (time to be serious ):

I think one of the most important things about staying sane when married is to always try to have time alone away from the kids the work the responsibilities. Book a vacation, go watch a movie or have dinner together it’s very very important or you will start forgetting the person you fell in love with because you get consumed with responsibilities and the day to day routine.

Unplug from all that and just have some fun… speaking of which, hubs and I are going to Punta Cana on July 30th … woooohoooo … for a week 🙂 check it out. Little 7aki is staying with my mother in law for the week :D.

Another very important thing is to have time alone FROM each other, it is very very important too. Book time to go out with the girls or the boys alone or just some sanity time by yourself to think and reflect on things. Losing who you were before marriage is not good, this is the person your husband or wife fell in love with from the first place.

So being stuck to each other all the time is not good you have to give each other some space or you will drive each other insane. Every week my husband and I have a day out each with our friends. It gives us energy and we have something new to talk about.

Apologise when you know you’ve wronged the other person. Pride is Evil! Apologizing shows that you respect the other person and that you don’t take them for granted and that you care about them.

The other day I was just , I donno, hormonally imbalanced … lol … and I ended up snapping at my husband and I was just mean. I noticed it kinda upset him but he didn’t say anything about it so after I cooled off I apologized right away and said “Sorry 7ayaty for snapping. I am just in a bad mood and I shouldn’t have taken it out on you”.

Now this might sound like a cliché but the saying “never go to bed angry at each other” is sooo right, there is nothing worse than the morning after where you wake up angry at each other, it’s just awkward. You have to resolve the problems as soon as they happen and never let them brew EVER. Always say what’s on your mind but always be respectful and civil never attack and never criticize. The discussion you have with the husband or wife should always have a point. Never argue just for the sake of arguing.

If I need something or want something from my husband I always tell him directly no hints no insinuations, they don’t work, because the other person cannot read your mind and you are setting yourself up for disappointment.

Another thing is always have a sense of humour because it keeps you guys alive, laugh at some problems or situations because at the end of the day it’s just mostly silly stuff you argue about. Really!

For example who cares if the bed was not made today? It’s just the bed! Will it change your life if it never gets made? Will it change anything? The answer is no so learn to sweat the important stuff not the small stuff because the small stuff is … well …small and insignificant. Now if you are anal by nature you have to try and work on that, that’s something you can change and should try and change.

Marriage is not butterflies and rainbows all the time but it is lots of fun. You have a soul mate that knows you more than anybody in the world and the closest to you that you share things with that you cannot share with friend’s, family or anybody. Love each other, comfort each other and be there for each other.

My only advice is to choose well.

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33 Responses

  1. Bullshit!

    What works for you, doesn’t necessarily work for others.

    Sex becomes a boring duty after couple of years.

    After reading your blog. It’s clear that your hubby doesn’t read it. How would any man like it if his wife is talking about their sex life online?

    Married people should stop bragging about this Utopian existence because in 90% of the time they’re both miserable. The rest they just don’t realize it yet!

    I feel sorry for you, and people who blelieve such crap!

    Oh and for your Khoz married you

  2. 7aki Fadi- my God. I had to rub my eyes few times to check if I was actually reading this on your blog or not. I hope you were not hacked by someone who is attempting to fool us.
    I am ok with the contents but the start of it swiped me off my feet..hehehehe

    7aki Sex & Angry Husband – dudes, I think you are exaggerating. She only described the obvious in her opening sentences. She didn’t discuss her “SEX LIFE”. I can’t see anything about the positions she take, the moves she does, how long does it take her to get an orgasm, etc..If I am missing something, please guide me. Otherwise, I wouldn’t rush to attack ppl blindly.

  3. 7aki, TOO CUTE with lots of truth!! Hey, with no visuals, what you wrote is still sort of PG, mish?

    Angry husband, I think you need to reconsider your own responsibility for the ways you’ve blown it. I had a bit of sympathy for you at first, but you are obviously in complete denial as to your own character problems.

    There are a LOT of happily married people out there. Birds of a feather flock together. Your comment got you in big trouble with me, because now I am going to pray for you. 🙂

  4. I was about to send you an email to state to you my opinion and disgust at the comment of “7aki sex” (thank you for deleting his/her comment) and angry husband..when I thought you were gonna delete the post forever.

    I am glad the post is still there

  5. When someone’s life is misrable it doesn’t mean that he/she is smart and reached the ultimate discovery that marriage sucks, the discovery that you should reach is that you were wrong when you made your choice, it is only your fault that you are now a case study on failed marriages..It was funny at first but then it became boring..

    7aki, I thought you removed the post, but hey you didn’t which is GOOD..

  6. Angry husband: Can you explain how I talked about my sex life online?
    And even if I did talk about my private life it’s none of your business is it?

    Why don’t you go do the dishes before you get into trouble … and don’t forget to change the babies diaper while you are at it … if there is a khuz anywhere here … IT’S YOU.

    See it’s easy for me to attack you man so keep it civil…if anybody is airing dirty laundry it’s you buddy not me.

    What a double faced hypocrite.

  7. And another thing does your wife read your blog? Does she like to be called fat head and whatever VILE CRAP you spew on your blog?

    Hypocrite.

    And FYI, my husband knows about my blog it’s called TRUST .. go look it up in the dictionary.

    OK I am done now.

  8. Hamza: No no I was updating it I did not delete it :). Why would I delete it? I write what I want when I want and illi mish 3ajboh yto2 rasoh bil7ait.

    Kinzi: Glad you liked it :).

    mohanned: Exactly!

  9. *lol* when u said funny i would have never guessed that opening..*lol*
    ah just ignore angry husband..and i didnt get to see the other comment..which i guess is good…
    good post…have fun on your vacation..im so jealous!! 🙂

  10. Angry Husband, get an effing life.

    7aki, mwah!

  11. Sam: LOL … shofty ballah ya sam .. hehehehe..

    I think nobody is actually reading the post …lol, they read the first 2 paragraph and the comments w bas.
    Bas keef the resort? AMAZING sa7? I think they are just jelous.

    Roba: Allah yis3edek 🙂 mwah X 10

  12. I always suspected that sex has something to do with it 🙂

    Don’t worry 7aki … I don’t know why some people (ehm ehm) tend to immediately reflect a thought at it’s orginator (so if you say crime, this doesn’t mean you’re plotting it) but it appears that the mere mentioning of the word “Sex” is enough to make “some” people go haywire

    Angry Husband. Man I understand your frustration. But your generalizations are a little bit false. So take it easy. Fada7tna!

  13. a great post 7aki.
    I love your response to “mental” husband. it made laugh!

  14. Wow, great post 7aki fadi! Everything you said about marriage is so true! Sex comes with the package too- which i might add is the best part-, otherwise how else would it be fun??
    Married people get more sex than single ones anyway. Yes, they can be creative at it too.
    I think that “angry husband” is virtual and he is just married to “the wrong (whatever bad names he calls her) virtual wife”!

  15. who pissed off 7aki ? what is exactly sexual about the post ! ? isn’t that something you find out when you are like 8 years old that married people have sex or are you so in denial that your parents ever did it while you are alive.

    So so so childish of you angry husband, no wonder your are waist deep in shit, you lack the ability to communicate.

    As for the post 7aki, thanks for the advice and hope to remember when the time comes, and your last advice is so important it should be in BOLD Red with warning signs and of the largest font possible

  16. Q: If you associate with people like this guy no wonder you have issues with marriage! OMG Q…
    You really should pick your friends more wisely …3anjad!

    globalorama: hehehe … glad you liked the post.

    Summer: 🙂 . glad you liked it … but you and Kinzi are our role models, your and her posts were AMAZING.

    no_angel : LOL … seems somebody needs to get laid…thanks for the support 🙂

  17. sho meen mza3el 7aki? wal yhemek best blogger. Great post and so right. And brave update by the way.

    Please keep the good stuff. I have a very busy schedule since few months, the last time I watched TV is two months ago, and guess what, I check and read your blog every day or every other day. I hope that tells something.

    My greatest respect dear friend.

  18. WOW
    AngryHusband….I really feel sorry for you because you don’t fall under the category of people who CHOSE WELL! Which is the category of spouses 7aki was directing her writing to. Seriously get a life. God help the kids being raised under your custody!

    7aki …again…I really enjoyed reading that

  19. I thought I was going to read sex how-to for couples. I was disappointed 😛

    I don’t see why people are making a big deal… you don’t even discuss sex. Unless you deleted that section. I am completely puzzled.

    I think the best part of make up sex is when, after everything is done, you slap hubby and be on rage again 😀 LooooooooooooooooooL.

    He’d feel so used

  20. go 7aki go 7aki

    :all new crazy frog dances:

    wallah this post it so true … but i didnt understand where the attack came from … and i missed the deleted comment …

    neyal ur hubz feeke … o have a hubzy dubzy time fe tora bora place that’s maybe in mexico or sth …

  21. tzok tzok tzok ya 3aib eshoom ya 7aki!!!

    but really some people are closed minded, one paragraph of your post is about the 3aib eshoom! and they are make a big issue of it! jad ya 3aib eshoom 3alaihom.

    another request from a guy in UAE please ma tkatre men 3aib eshom or else etisalat would block your blog.

    nice post!

  22. *making

  23. ya3ni i swear 24 hour sex is the only reason i’d get married.

    hhhmmmm

    anyway……

    i love u 7aki! 🙂

    And here’s my little spiel – I say if anyone knows angry husband personally, and considers themselves a friend of his, this is what u must do: ensure he has a lot of sex SOON. a lot of GOOD SEX. soon. really. A lot. Like starting now.

    khalas ana infada7et infada7et. Ray7a awalli.

  24. What else people marry each other for?! Love? I love my mother but I won’t marry her!

    Sex is the main reason a couple make it to the altar! and it is no shame to just admit it.

    Angry Husband seems to be angry on anthing, he reminds me of “Sanfoor ghadban” (remember the smurfs?)

    This is actually a very nice post 7aki. It highlights your spirit and your emotional maturity in dealing with your marriage.

    I am sure that you and your husband are a wonderful couple.

    God bless you both,
    and also bless cute little 7aki 🙂

  25. LoooL @ married people DO HAVE SEX 😀

    Well I do agree with each and every single of your advises, they are simply true!

  26. good post 7aki! 🙂

    and WOW does Punta Cana look great or what?! Do keep us posted on that, not the sex part, but things in general, lol!

    You have fun there!

  27. Oh, I almost forgot, can someone please give the angry husband his daily chill pill?

    angry husband, you have all the right to be angry, I mean anyone who his wife treats her cat better than she treats him would be, but that’s no excuse to take it out on the rest of the bloggers around here. If your marriage is all fucked up that doesn’t mean all relations are.

  28. Nice Post i must say.

    about being stuck to each other thingy, sometimes going out (togather) with a group of friends is another way to give any couple an enerygy.

    Btw everyday when i wake up i like to make my bed, khalas its something like a habbit. and if i dont i feel so crappy the whole day 😛 (MONK WAY :P)

  29. Hey Fadi Malian : it’s always great hearing from you 😀
    What you said is really sweet :).
    Thanks so much for reading the blog.. yallah maybe when you are not so busy you’ll start posting something too.

    Dandoon: glad you enjoyed it 🙂

    KJ: About “He’d feel so used” HAHAHAAHAHA …
    that cracked me up … lol …. Thanks for the laugh.
    The post is as is and nothing was deleted by the way.

    Isam: The deleted comment is just vile, bad language so you really didn’t miss much :).
    And Tora Bora????? LOL LOL man that is in Afghanistan? Biddka shiklak itkhaes 3alainah hehehehe
    It’s punta cana in the Dominican republic 😀

    Sel3: Ya 3aeb ilshoom 3alayeh … 3anjad … shu biddak itswaee sittat akher zaman … lol

    Hal: I love you tooooooooo .. mwah!

    Observer: Thanks Observer , God bless the people you love too 🙂

    Jasim: Glad you agree.

    Whosane: LOL LOL I will definitely keep you posted about “things in general”

    Maher: Of course, going out together with friends is always important , that is good advice too.
    About the bed, gosh there is nothing more I hate than making the bed .. lol .. or doing any chores for that matter … hehehe

  30. 7aki,, this post is the best advice anyone can ever give, yup, THAAANK YOU, there is nothing wrong with the opening,, whats the fuss this angry guy making here?? i bet you hit a nerve that hurts!

    anyways sweet 7aki, fukkek minno! thinking of him is a waste of energy,, i don’t think anyone is having a healthier and happier life than you guys, stay safe and enjoy the vacation 🙂

  31. Thanks taltoul 😀 … inti wallah ili sweet 😀

  32. Hi 7aki. I’ve been reading your blog for a while and I can identify with alot of it 🙂 I was shocked at the comments of this post since your reference to sex was not at all personal… I bet people would have just laughed if you were a guy but because you are a woman, it is taboo for you to say something like this. A girl’s gotta stand up for what she believe’s in, and if people don’t like it, too bad. There are people out there who are mature enough to get the message 😀 Here’s to girl power!!

  33. Tinker: Cheers to that! I am amazed at how some people are, the thing is if I was not an Arab woman they would also laugh because once you are Arab alas you are not allowed.

    By the way, loved your blog 🙂 I am gonna visit it again.

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