You blow it and you die

Little 7aki opened the garage door looked at her dad and said : Baba, I want to stay outside with you.

Baba 7aki who was smoking outside: No no sweetie go inside.

Little 7aki: Don’t smoke.

Baba 7aki: …. (silence).

Little 7aki: I hate smoking, throw it away.

Baba 7aki: Go inside sweetie go inside

Little 7aki: You blow it and you die. I hate it, don’t ever smoke again!

Me: Come on sweetie lets go inside.

Little 7aki when we were inside: Is Baba going to die?

My daughter is very inquisitive about death and dying and health in general.

She asks me: Where are Cinderella’s Mom and Dad, where are Snow whites parents? Did they die? Where do they go when they die?

I tell her they go to heaven because honestly, this is the easiest thing I can tell her. So one time there was a cartoon and a dinosaur died in it and she asked me: Where does the dinosaur go when it dies? I told her that it goes to heaven and she looked alarmed and said: but Cinderella’s Mommy is in heaven and the dinosaur will eat her ! So I told her that most probably there is a heaven for people and a heaven for animals.

Then she once asked me: Why do people die? Why did your Daddy die?

I told her that when people are old and when people are not healthy they die and that my fathers heart was sick.

The first question she asked me was: Are you and Baba old?

She broke my heart.

Then she asked me: Are you and Baba healthy? Is Baba’s heart sick?

I explained that yes we are healthy and we eat good food and we eat our vegetables and we eat no fat that’s why our heart is healthy. And she said , yes Baba is healthy and I am healthy right? My heart is healthy because I don’t eat fat right? I said right.

The first time Little 7aki learned about smoking is in one of the older cartoon movies (101 Dalmatians) Cruela Davil was smoking (In old movies almost all villains smoked!) and she asked me, what is this coming out of her mouth, I said, smoke, she is smoking and smoking is very very bad for you and it is not healthy then she said: But Baba smokes. And that’s when she started noticing her dad smoking .

So she knows smoking is not healthy and she cannot get over the fact that her dad smokes and she hates it and is vocal to her dad about it.

Even now when I ask her: Where is your dad she says: He’s outside. I ask her what is he doing outside she says: He is smoking . I hate smoking right mama? It’s not good.

No, It’s not good at all my little philosopher.


22 Responses

  1. I love all the questions kids ask…some of them are extremely hard and make you stop to really think. What do you say to them and how detailed do you get… it’s really difficult.

    My father is a heavy smoker, even though he tries very hard not to smoke when the kids (I have 12 nieces and nephews), sometimes he does … The kids approach him and tell him “seedo don’t smoke, or you’ll die.” He responds with “We’re all going to die.” It’s baffling how lightly he takes it and sometimes I wonder what kind of example he sets for the kids when he answers with such… though I find it funny, it’s still not ‘right.’ .. anyway, I may sound contradictory to those who know me …sine, I myself, am a (light) smoker! but I never light up in front of the kids..

    My brother used to be a smoker until the day his daughter was sobbing to her mother that ‘baba is going to die.’ My brother never smoked inside the house…one day, his daughter saw him – through the window – smoking outside. She went to her mom and said ‘Is baba going to die? he’s smoking. Smoking kills.’ she was very emotional. Then when her dad walked back into the house she told him that she doesn’t want him to smoke anymore because ‘smoking kills’ and she doesn’t ‘want to grow up without a dad.’ Aww…he told her that he will not smoke anymore… I guess a few days later, she saw him smoking outside…at the time she didn’t say anything. Later in the evening, when it was bed time…her mom was reading her a book and when she leaned to the side to kiss her good night, she noticed that her face is wet … tears have been fallen down her cheeks ..when her mom asked what was wrong…she said ‘baba is going to die … I don’t wanna grow up without a dad.’ then she started sobbing. 😀 my niece is VERY sensitive …and in ways tends to dramatize things … in a cute considerate way! ever since, her dad had stopped smoking. The power little kids can have over some of us is immeasurable.

  2. I think baba 7aki should REALLY consider the little philosopher’s point of view about smoking 😀

  3. *sobbing uncontrollably*

  4. 7abeeebtiii !!! she is so cute mshalla.
    i wish my baba can stop smoking too, akh!! i hate smoking more than anything on earth.

  5. Walek AMAR, your girl is the sweetest! It broke my heart a little to read this post. Maybe this will give Baba 7aki some incentive.

  6. Mashallah your girl is amazing! Adorable.

    My dad used to be a heavy smoker. but when my mom was in Chicago he didnt smoke a single one..recently he is smoking like two/three a day.

    maybe my mom drives him crazy..maybe :p

  7. I hope baba 7aki will listen to little 7aki and quit. I did it, and I’m sure he can do it too

    hugs and kisses to the little angel

  8. aww… the question about if you guys are healthy IS heartbreaking! 😦 I hope baba 7aki listen to little 7aki. bt3arfi… I wish to see a pic of her, she sounds so cute! lol.

  9. That little girl is fakhmeh,smth tells me she will be more than a motivation for her father quiting smoke.

  10. Iman: My husband never smoked u=inside the house or in front of little 7aki so he’s good like that. He attempted quitting a number of times but he always goes back to smoking when he is stressed.
    That comment made me almost cry man! Your niece is soooooooo loving and caring. Allah yi7meeha.

    Secratea: I think so too, I am working on him 🙂

    Mo: 😦 . I read Iman’s comment and I was ready to sob too!

    Mai: I hate smoking too wallah Mai, it’s just wrong!

    Dana: Yes I told him about it and he is a very sensitive man so hopefully he’ll listen.

    Maher: LOL. Listen Maher, you can’t live with us and you can’t live without us so embrace your future 😛 .

    Qwaider: Good on you Qwaider. Baba 7aki tried a bunch of times and stopped for 6 months but he always goes back.

    Batoul: It is 😦 . kids are so sensitive.
    Maybe one day I will share her picture with the readers 🙂 . She has long curly hair down to her waist, Big hazel eyes with thick eyelashes that are like fans . She has a dimple on her cheek and chin and she is as goofy as can be because she likes to joke around a lot. She laughs from her belly 🙂 .

    Mr. Anon: I believe so too 🙂 .

  11. lool mashAllah… Allah y7meeha wo trabouha b 3ezkom. Shes sounds beauty.

  12. heh..and I thought of sharing the story of my cousin teaching his 2 year old kid how to hold an argeeleh and smoke it. That’s of course after he learned to drink the heavy arabic coffee

    But seriously, watch out for little 7aki. You don’t want her to over-philosophize and ask alot of questions. Or she’ll end up like that kid in that funeral we went to. fada7na. He kept saying: “mom, why are you crying? is it because grandma died? hah mom…is it because grandma died”? and he kept repeating that statement over a dozen times.

  13. A colleague at work wouldn’t leave smoking until his newborn got a breathing problem from his “smoke breath”. I’m not fond of children, but sometimes they will state the obvious where no one else will dare or bother. Way to go little 7aki.

  14. 7ayati that was so sweet, broke my heart as well.

    I wonder what are Baba 7aki’s thoughts on this though.. how does he feel when his daughter asks him these questions?

  15. Batoul: Thanks 😀

    Hamza: So your couzin thinks it’s funny? what a stupid thikng to do 3anjad.
    OMG little 7aki asks the most awkward questions sometimes

    KJ: Her dad feels really bad when she says that and he is trying hard to quit. Wish us luck 🙂

    Hani: My sister in law, her dad used to smoke and she got really bad asthma that still affect her and get her hospitalized to this day. He only stopped smoking around her when she 9 and told the doctor to tell him that she is in the hospital because of him, and it was true, so the doctor said that and the father was devastated and never smoked a cigarette around her once since then. too late if you ask me.
    It baffles my mind some people’s ignorance when it comes to smoking around children!

  16. U have a genius daughter. How the hell did she not guilt her Baba into quitting yet? 😀

  17. Really nice post – thanx for sharing

  18. When I was a baby, it was found that baba’s smoking would almost kill me, so he stopped for a while, but then went back to it but NEVER in the house.. Only in the balcony..

    I LOVE LI’L 7AKI 😀

  19. Hal: Well guess what, he is quiting 😀 .

    Sara: Yeah Baba 7aki NEVER smokes in the house.

  20. Kids always , always say something that break hearts , few weeks ago , i was very very ill and when i came back from the hospital ,Sara my little one was so worry about me and keep asking me every moment if i was going to die … thats sad … after 100 times i ask her why you are so worry of me diying? she respond , Mama if you and Baba die I will be alone ,I wont have none with me ….thats sad .. but she your litte one is right … she iw worry about you …and the kids always are worry about us … what they will do if something happend to us? … wink

  21. Lorena: Awww I am sorry you’re not feeling well, I really hope you get better soon.

    My daughter is the apple of my eye, kids are preciuos.

  22. […] You blow it and you die […]

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