On Being Busy

The eternal argument between women who stay at home and women who work is who’s busier and who does more work the woman that balances family and career or the  woman who chose her family as a career.

To be honest, now that I am staying at home for a year it feels I am much busier now than when I was working. Granted my house work is the same, I mean I had to cook then and now I do too, the laundry had to be done and the house needed to be cleaned but now instead of dedicating 10+ hours a day to go to work and work and come back I dedicate those 10 hours to my family and home.

While I was working I was updating my blog more, I was visiting more blogs and I was commenting on those blogs and chatting with friends. Now it seems that I do check some blogs but the list is getting smaller and smaller. I hardly comment on any blogs including mine because I am so busy.

How in the heck was I working and beinga Mom? I think one had to suffer and unfortunately it was the family. I feel that we are a much happier family that I am home. Little 7aki is happier, I am happier, baba 7aki is happier. It feels less stressful now that I am home and everybody is taken care of.

I have to go back to work in September and for the first time in my life I don’t want to. I always thought I wanted the career and the both family and work but not anymore. I would love to stay at home for a real balanced life and not having to take orders from stupid people or hang around people I hated just because I share the same workspace with them.

2 years ago I said if I won the lottery I would not quit my job but now, I would quit in a heartbeat.


9 Responses

  1. I enjoyed reading this! the difference between both of us is that I have always said that I don’t want to divide my life between home and work…I haven’t tried a full time job while a mother and I don’t think I will, it’s scary to be honest ya3ni:p I don’t think I will ever manage.
    ya3tiki il 3afyeh, now that u have 2 kids akeed it’s busier!

  2. Although I’m not married and not even clas to having children, this is something that I often think about. I definitely don’t think stay at home moms are less busy than those that work…in fact I think it’s the opposite because stuff around the house and kids never ends whereas when you work you set limits on what you do at home and with family and not feel as bad about it. You justify it because you’re working.

    Right now I think I would like to have a well-paying job and just work part-time which a lot of women in my field do and it’s part of the reason why I chose my field.

    Who knows what’ll actually happen when I’m in a position where I feel torn between family and self-sufficiency.

  3. a short post but yet extremely informative.

    I’ve always been against stay home moms and i always thought that they are not ambitious enough and don’t wanna go through the hassle of working and having a career.

    but from knowing you through your posts, I can kind of see your point of view and how your mentality has changed over a span of 2 years.

    I can already feel that the day will come where you’d stop blogging and when it’ll happen, none of us will blame you. 🙂

  4. hey we miss you poo poo head !
    Well talk from experience *ahem ahem* having 2 kids in the house is not just twice as busy its almost 5 times as busy !
    Although i don’t really think that we always get to do the things that we want (like stay at home) but if you can more power to you.
    You know what i think ? you see how you feel your mind flipped on this topic now ? you will face another flip on the subject when they are well into their school years (think 2nd and third grade) or maybe later on when they get more involved in school and stop spending as much time at home.
    7aki, you are happy right ? then forget about that tint of guilt that you had in the past, our hindsight is 20/20 and that doesn’t help us, you were happy (i think) back then as well and all of that was done in pursuit of happiness for you and your family… just keep on doing what your doing then.

  5. 7aki, stay home and enjoy these short years as you have been. I can hear your heart. There is a time to go back to work, but if the house is more peaceful, then enjoy it!

    It is hard work, but there is great satisfaction. Since I work from home, it is a battle to stay engaged even though I am present, it is a different battle.

    I do miss you in the blogosphere, but believe your time is best spent with your little 7akiyyyas adn their baba.

    I saw Sister 7aki’s co-worker a few days ago. Made me remember I need to call her!

  6. do you like it better being a home mom or do you prefer being a working mom ?

  7. Nido: I think the secret to having a full time job while being a mom is you have to LOVE the job 100% to be happy. But imagine neglecting your family for a job you hate? unbearable.

    Asoom: See you are lucky you are choosing your career now that you are more mature and you know what it takes to raise a family. When I chose my career I was 17 and who thinks about kids when they are about to go to Uni?
    If I can do it over again I would chose a career where I can be part time because I believe that is the perfect combo.

    Hamza: I never was against stay at home moms but I felt I would be bored and boy was I wrong. There is so much to do and I have a much richer life now. If I could get a part time job that would be the perfect balance for me.

    bam: Miss you too bumbum head 😀 .
    To be honest bam I effing hate my job. So after being at home and seeing how much of a difference I am making in my family’s life and how much happier we are it makes it even harder to go back. 2 years ago I really loved my job and it chalanged me but now not so much (and to be honest hte pay was much better , LOL) BUT we have to pay the bills and staying at home at this stage in our life is not an option especially with the recession. Effing stupid American banks and their stupidity. Because of them baba 7aki might not get a bonus this year and that effing sucks ass.
    Some people say that being at home once your kids hit 8 – 13 is more important because that’s when they start getting in trouble. sigh. It’s hard.

    Kinzi: I hear you Kinzi, working at home makes you work longer hours and you can never leave work and focus on kids because home IS your work. Being a mom is just hard.

    Jim: I prefer being a home mom 😀 .

  8. You know, our priorities change as we go through life.

    You probably are at the stage where you feel you did your share of working and developing a career. It is no longer as tempting as it used to be when you first started out. Also, remember that you are extra busy now because you just gave birth and instead of taking care of one, you have two, plus your husband.

    Maybe when your little girls grow up you will be less busy and begin to miss work.

  9. Since I got laid off I have also been much busier! It’s funny how much work or pending work we have to do outside our jobs!

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