I Have EVIL in My House …

 

The DEVIL

… and it’s called Baby Alive Wet and Giggle.

The key word here is WET, she wets her diaper.

KILL ME NOW!!!

Little Buddha, who is almost 3, is OBSESSED with changing her diaper every 5 minutes, I am not exaggerating, we gave it to her , as an Eid present , on Tuesday at 9 and except for her 1.5 hour naps I , yes I, changed her diaper 1,038,754,572,384 times.

But see, this gift, although is evil, is a blessing in disguise; I am now SURE I do not want a third child.

Ahhhhh, that felt good LOL.

And the diapers are none reusable, WTF??? I now need to buy doll diapers???? Are you people on Crack??? So I am heading to the baby store in search of cloth diapers, for preemies, very green of me.

Sigh, what I do for my kids.

Ho’ing

Little Buddha: What’s that noise? Is someone ho’ing outside.

7aki (double take) : What was that? whose doing what?

Little Buddha: I hear baba ho’ing outside.

7aki: 😯 ? what?

little Buddha: He is ho’ing the lawn.

7aki: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. You mean MOWING the lawn?

little Buddha: Yeah, ho’ing the lawn.

7aki to Baba 7aki through the window: Hey, baba 7aki, will ya take a break from ho’ing please! HAHAHAHAHA.

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Happy Eid my loyal readers. And please it’s Eid! You should stop ho’ing the lawn and take a break and go out and have some fun.

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Also in other exciting news, you can now comment on the blog using your twitter handle or your facebook profile! thanks to the gorgeous people of WordPress 😀 .

Is There Such a Thing As a Moderate Muslim Woman?

Moderate Muslim Women in the Muslim Society have it hard.

Last Eid got me thinking about the state of Moderate Muslim families / non practicing Muslims  particularly women.

We have an Arab mosque close to our house. We drove by it on our way to the traditional Eid lunch with the family. In the mosque courtyard there was some kind of bazaar/activities to celebrate Eid and it was busy with people and children.

Here in Canada Eid is viewed more as a religious affair. Most of the celebrations revolve around mosques and such things. So it makes it really hard for moderate people to participate in such activities.

I would have loved to participate in such events so my kids can feel the sense of community, to soak in the Eid experience that is full of joy for them.

But I was disheartened because even  if she was to go, I can be no part of that experience.  The combination if  woman, no hijab and mosque don’t go together.

Men are allowed to go in mosques anytime and they don’t have to change themselves or hide anything, but I as a woman have to change, my clothes , my demeanor , almost everything to be able to participate. And I am not only talking about going into the mosque itself,  I am talking about any activities organized by a religious entity.

Moderate Muslim women can be no part of  such activities.

It’s hard for me to understand or define what is it to be an accepted moderate muslim woman. Does it mean you have to wear the hijab but not practice? Does it mean you do not wear the hijab but you practice. Or is it to be aware of the teachings but not practice or wear the hijab?

It’s harder for a woman to be moderate because while a man can hide his religion inside him, in his heart,  the  woman has to have it on public display.

What are your thoughts?

 

Happy Kharoof Day and Merry Xmas

kharoofholidays.jpeg

 I just wanted to wish everyone a happy kharoof day and a merry Christmas.

I took 2 days off this year and I am super excited, I took Thursday and Friday off  giving me a super long weekend of 4 days, then I am off again next week on Tuesday for 3 days for Xmas and then it’s new years, gosh, you gotta love December!

 So I wish you all a happy Eid and Christmas. Relax, eat a lot and be Merry . Well at least that’s what I’m doing 🙂 .

oh oh, one more thing, DON’T DRINK AND DRIVE.

HO HO … HOE?

Political correctness annoys me when it starts getting ridiculous.

I remember when I first came to Canada and they declared that the Christmas tree should no longer be called a Christmas Tree but instead we should be calling it “Holiday Tree”. All Christmas get togethers and lunches are to be called holiday lunches and get togethers.

Correct me if I am wrong but Muslims don’t have to decorate a tree as part of their tradition nor Jews nor  Hindus nor Buddhists or any other religion out there so I don’t get what holiday they refer to?

 I understand they are trying to be politically correct and culturally sensitive to us immigrants or people with different religions but not to call it what it clearly is  is ridiculous really.

Jews are not going to change the Menorah’s name and call it the holiday candle stick thingy it’s like asking Muslims to change the Eid kharoof name to the holiday kharoof, lol. If we Muslims or others had something that symbolizes our traditions and religions and we were asked to change the name we will be in an uproar and claim discrimination and hell will break loose.

But the peaceful Canada suppressed the majority to please a minority, I kinda think it’s stupid but then again I can’t but admire a nation that cares for it’s minorities 😀 .

So now in Australia the people that are being taught to be Old Saint Nick (Santa) are being told to say “HA HA HA” instead of “HO HO HO” because certain people will be offended.

It might scare the kids they said and offend some women because it could be interpreted as being HOE HOE HOE, LOL, how stupid is that????? Seriously. But this piece of news reminded me when I was a kid and I learned what a hoe was every-time I heard Santa say HO HO HO I giggled, lol.

So I was on the train the other day and I told my friends that I am going to refer to all the hoes out there as a bunch of HA’s so I am more politically correct…hehehehe

Which reminds me: William had sent me this email which I found HILARIOUS that kinda relates to this subject:

FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: 4th November
RE: Christmas PartyI’m happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23rd, starting at noon in the private function room at the Grill House. There will be a cash bar and plenty of drinks! We’ll have a small band playing traditional carols…please feel free to sing along.And don’t be surprised if the Managing Director shows up dressed as Santa Claus! A Christmas tree will be lit at 1.00 p.m.Exchange of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however, no gift should be over $10.00 to make the giving of gifts easy for everyone’s pockets.

This gathering is only for employees! The Managing Director will make a special announcement at the Party.

Merry Christmas to you and your Family.

Pauline

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FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: 5th November

RE: Holiday Party

In no way was yesterday’s memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees. We recognize that Chanukah is an important holiday, which often coincides with Christmas, though unfortunately not this year. However, from now on we’re calling it our ‘Holiday Party.’ The same policy applies to any other employees who are not Christians. There will be no Christmas tree or Christmas carols sung. We will have other types of music for your enjoyment.

Happy now?

Happy Holidays to you and your family,

Pauline.

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FROM; Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: 6th November

RE: Holiday Party

Regarding the note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous requesting a non-drinking table…you didn’t sign your name. I’m happy to accommodate this request, but if I put a sign on a table that reads, “AA Only,” you wouldn’t beanonymous anymore!!!! How am I supposed to handle this? Somebody?

Forget about the gift exchange, no gift exchange allowed now since the Union Officials feel that $10.00 is too much money and Management believe $10.00 is a little cheap.

NO GIFT EXCHANGE WILL BE ALLOWED.

Pauline.

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FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: 7th November

RE: Holiday Party

What a diverse group we are! I had no idea that December 20th begins the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, which forbids eating and drinking during daylight hours. There goes the party! Seriously, we can appreciate how a luncheon at this time of year does not accommodate our Muslim employees’ beliefs, perhaps the Grill House can hold off on serving your meal until the end of the party – or else package everything up for you to take home in a little foil doggy bag. Will that work?

Meanwhile, I’ve arranged for members of Weight Watchers to sit farthest from the dessert buffet and pregnant women will get the table closest to the toilets, Gays are allowed to sit with each other, Lesbians do not have to sit with gay men, each will have their own table.

Yes, there will be flower arrangements for the gay men’s table, too.

To the person asking permission to cross dress – no cross dressing allowed. And No, no blow-up sheep.

We will have booster seats for short people. Low fat food will be available for those on a diet. We cannot control the salt used in the food. We suggest those people with high blood pressure taste the food first. There will be fresh fruits as
dessert for Diabetics, the restaurant cannot supply “No Sugar” desserts. Sorry!

Did I miss anything?!?!?!?!?!

Pauline.

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FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All F****** Employees
DATE: 8 November

RE: The ******** Holiday Party.

Vegetarian pricks I’ve had it with you people!!! We’re going to keep this party at the Grill House whether you like it or not, so you can sit quietly at the table furthest from the “grill of death”, as you so quaintly put it. You’ll get your f****** salad bar, including organic tomatoes, but you know tomatoes have feeling, too. They scream when you slice them. I’ve heard them scream. I’m hearing them scream right NOW!!

Hope you all have a rotten holiday * drink, drive, and die!

The Bitch from HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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FROM: John Bishop – Acting Human Resources Director
DATE: 9th November

RE: Pauline Lewis and Holiday Party

I’m sure I speak for all of us in wishing Pauline Lewis a speedy recovery, and I’ll continue to forward your cards to her.

In the meantime, Management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party and instead, give everyone the afternoon of the 23rd December off with full pay.