Why 2011 Sucked Ass And Why I Am Glad It’s Behind Me

Posted on January 13, 2012 by 7aki Fadi

How I got my ass kicked

2011 kicked my ass.

Career wise: I got the job of my dreams … and lost it. This sucked for me the most and took me about 6 months to get over. The kicker is? My boss loved me, my team loved me, my bosses boss loved me and the project was so cutting edge and so amazing that it got ATTENTION from major corps …. but due to “budget cuts” the project I was working on got cut and I had to go back to my old job. Talking about it re-opens the wounds. SUCKS.

Health wise: Buddha had a lot of health issues this year. My poor baby. She had a severe asthma attack that landed her in the ER after a 911 call. She had pneumonia in November as well. How much can a 3 year old endure? A lot apparently because she is still bubbly and delicious to nibble on nom nom nom .
Little 7aki broke her arm IN THE SUMMER!!!! And I was just exhausted all the time due to the above points, and I cut my finger!!!!

SUCKS ASS.

Extended family wise: Lots of health issues, its part of getting older I guess and part of life but still SUCKS ASS.

Blog wise: WHAT BLOG? I neglected my blog and all the good stuff that comes with it, due to, HELLO, did you read the above!

We did go on nice trips tough and I did watch A LOT of amazing TV. I did join the gym and I did have fun with friends and I read a lot of GREAT books but in general the year was Meh, Blah and Gaaaaah.

2012… BEHAVE!

Filed under: biddi mama, drama, dysfunction, ew, health, Just Shoot Me, kill me now, life, MOFO BIB - BIB, Rant | Tagged: , , , | 1 Comment »

11 years … and counting

Posted on January 12, 2012 by 7aki Fadi

Today marks the 11th year wedding anniversary for me and Baba 7aki. Just saying I have been married for 11 years makes me feel old!!!!exclamation mark!!!!

What’s an anniversary without gifts? A sucky one that’s what it is, hahahaha.

This year we went totally techie and bought each other a joint gift, yes we did. So here is what we got each other together for us:

1) LG 3D TV. Oh yes you read that right, 3D. It’s OUT OF THIS WORLD.

The movie comes in the house

Little Buddha could not stop saying:” Look Mama, the movie is coming into the house!” And asked her Grandma: “Do you know what 3D means? It means the movie is in the house” Looking all smart and knowing. YES , Buddha is going to carry the family techie torch.

2) Panasonic sound bar.

OMG its wireless

It;s a thing of beauty. And the sound is unbelievable.

So we decided we’ll buy these and not get each other any other gifts. But Baba 7aki being the sneaky guy he is went and bought me the most COOLEST headphones EVER!!!

3) Panasonic retro headphones.

They are green.....GREEN!!

They are gorgeous.

Usually I am the one who tricks Baba 7aki, but this time he managed to surprise me :) .

So yeah, one nice 11 year wedding anniversary full of unnecessary consumption; just the way I like it. Eheheheheheh.

.

Filed under: Baba 7aki, marriage | Tagged: , , , | 3 Comments »

The Best Thing That Happened To Me In 2012 … So Far

Posted on January 11, 2012 by 7aki Fadi

And it comes in a jar.

It’s a butter … that is made out of …. Wait for it … waiiiit for it … COOKIES!!!!!

It’s Trader Joe’s Speculoos Cookie Butter.

Heaven in a jar

Who thinks these things up? How crazy is that? Someone sat there and thought, hmmmm, I am going to take some cookies, ground them up and make them into butter because hey, life NEEDS spreadable cookies.

To the person who invented cookie butter, will you marry me?

It is sooo delicious it’s not even funny.

.

Filed under: Check these out, Food, Love | Tagged: , , | 2 Comments »

I’d Rather Be Poor

Posted on September 15, 2011 by 7aki Fadi

Bob: Its only 9:36 AM and wifey just called me from a store and wants to buy 2 patio lounge chairs. $120 Dollars . done .

7aki: Hahahaha

Bob: Who the eff goes to the store this early. The staff are probably saying what the eff!

7aki : She’s on a mission. You should buy that BMW you always wanted before your wife spends all your money.

Bob: You are right!

After a short pause..

Bob: Also, we have a complete patio set. We don’t need more shit!

7aki: You know what you should do? For every amount she spends on shit you don’t need take an equal amount and put it in a savings acount; call it “car fund”.

After another short pause..

7aki:  But, why don’t you just say: NO, don’t buy it.

Bob: Then l have to deal with an unhappy person; I’d rather be poor.

7aki: Words of wisdom my friend; the shit you say needs to be quoted somewhere!

Filed under: Bob, Bob says, Funny, Hilarious, humor, life, life Bob rambling, Philosophy, qoute, Rant | 2 Comments »

Just to Get Rid of the Picture, of the Finger, On the Home Page

Posted on September 7, 2011 by 7aki Fadi

Yeah, being at work and opening your blog and getting the finger, blog post below this one, is NOT a good idea,   HAHAHAHA.

So let me tell you how shitty it has been in the past few months:

- End of May baby Buddha had a very bad, and I am talking very bad respiratory distress emergency, asthma attack, at her daycare and she was barely breathing.

Daycare was HORRIBLE in handling the emergency; instead of calling 911 they waited for us to go pick her up and we are an hour drive away!  Luckily a relative lives close by and went to pick her up and as soon as she took one look at her she was shocked at her state. There is a clinic a hundred meters away and the stupid daycare sat there waiting for us to come save the day. The clinic saw her and called 911 immidiatly and she had to be taken to the hospital by an ambulance and I wasn’t there to go with her :( . Saying that the train ride home was the longest train ride IN MY LIFE is a understatement.

Some asthma medicine and oxygen fixed Buddha right up and she was fine but I was so stressed and crying the whole ride over.

So, due to the daycares complete and utter negligence we pulled her out that day and we didn’t look back.

They say bad things happen for good reasons and right now she is at the bestest daycare EVER. I am glad we moved her and I am so happy where she is right now. In a way her getting really sick allowed us to find her a much better place to thrive at.

Except it was real and much more less cute

- Not one month later, the FIRST day of summer vacation, little 7aki fell and fractured her arm, while we were at a beach resort none the less.

She had to have the cast on for four weeks. Nothing spells summer fun better than a broken arm!

She was a trooper though, the whole thing barely fazed her and she managed to have a fun summer.

Yup, it was her RIGHT arm that she uses for , you know, EVERYTHING

-  various colds and strep throats and eczema, yaaaaay, fun!

YAAAAAAAAY

- Then I cut my finger with a knife and had four stitches and also had the tetanus shot of death. My finger has not healed yet, yaaaaaay, fun!

I googled: Cut, finger, knife and ewwww the pictures were so gross. So I put a picture of a unicron.

Now that the summer of accidents is over and little 7aki is back to school I am looking forward to us having our boring old routine back.

That's me and my friends celebrating the end of the summer vacation.

YAY for back to school!!!!!

.

Filed under: drama, health, Just Shoot Me, kill me now, Little 7aki, Little Buddha, MOFO BIB - BIB, Mothering, Rant | 2 Comments »

The Finger

Posted on September 2, 2011 by 7aki Fadi

Oh yes you guessed it. It IS this finger.

So on Saturday I managed to slice my finger and it hurts like a MOFO.

The cut was SO deep, I called out: “Babaaaa 7aaaki! I think my finger is cut really badly” He took one look at it and said: “Calm down” which made me automatically  freak out.  Baba 7aki wanted to administer some first aid so he gets a band-aid and a paper towel to wrap it , yeah, we need a first aid kit, and then he SQUEEZED MY FINGER, you don’t understand, the cut was REALLY deep, so I was like, what are you doing? he said, I am applying pressure to stop the bleeding, and he squeezed again, and then I started to see stars and almost fainted. The end.

No. Of course that’s not the end!  Baba 7aki was not allowed to touch my finger after that.

All this happened at 7 pm , we had people coming over for Iftar(dinner) at 8:30. We had food in the oven, buddha was sleeping and I did not want to wake Buddha so I drove myself to the clinic, oh yes I did, and waited for 2 hours to get seen and fixed up.

I have 4 stitches and I am MAD, because see, Monday was my first day off on a 10 day vacation and my MOFO finger needs to be wrapped for SEVEN days before I can go get my stitches taken out.

So for 5 days I can’t get it wet, meaning, HOW WILL I WASH MY HAIR????

Then 2 days I have to freak out every time someone touches my hand because I am removing the bandage.

Then on Sunday I go to get the stitches taken out which leaves me only 3 days of fun.

FML.

Filed under: biddi mama, ew, Just Shoot Me, kill me now, me me me, MOFO BIB - BIB, ramadan, Rant | 2 Comments »

I Have EVIL in My House …

Posted on September 1, 2011 by 7aki Fadi

 

The DEVIL

… and it’s called Baby Alive Wet and Giggle.

The key word here is WET, she wets her diaper.

KILL ME NOW!!!

Little Buddha, who is almost 3, is OBSESSED with changing her diaper every 5 minutes, I am not exaggerating, we gave it to her , as an Eid present , on Tuesday at 9 and except for her 1.5 hour naps I , yes I, changed her diaper 1,038,754,572,384 times.

But see, this gift, although is evil, is a blessing in disguise; I am now SURE I do not want a third child.

Ahhhhh, that felt good LOL.

And the diapers are none reusable, WTF??? I now need to buy doll diapers???? Are you people on Crack??? So I am heading to the baby store in search of cloth diapers, for preemies, very green of me.

Sigh, what I do for my kids.

Filed under: 7aki peanut, baby, Eid, Just Shoot Me, kill me now, Little 7aki, Little Buddha, MOFO BIB - BIB, Rant | 6 Comments »

Ho’ing

Posted on August 30, 2011 by 7aki Fadi

Little Buddha: what’s that noise? Is someone ho’ing outside.

7aki (double take) : what was that? whose doing what?

Little Buddha: I hear baba ho’ing outside.

7aki: 8O ? what?

little Buddha: He is ho’ing the lawn.

7aki: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. You mean MOWING the lawn?

little Buddha: Yeah, ho’ing the lawn.

7aki to Baba 7aki through the window: Hey, baba 7aki, will ya take a break from ho’ing please! HAHAHAHAHA.

————————————————————————————————————————-

Happy Eid my loyal readers. And please it’s Eid! You should stop ho’ing the lawn and take a break and go out and have some fun.

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Also in other exciting news, you can now comment on the blog using your twitter handle or your facebook profile! thanks to the gorgeous people of WordPress :D .

Filed under: 7aki peanut, Baba 7aki, Eid, fa3es, Funny, Hilarious, humor, Little Buddha | 3 Comments »

Double Douchy

Posted on July 6, 2011 by 7aki Fadi

(A guest post by Bob)

I hate my job so much that l’d rather spend time detailing inane conversations l have….

Sunday night, wife and l are at the park sitting on the bench watching the kids play. My cellphone rings and l quickly take a look at the call display and promptly put it back in my pocket – deciding not to answer the call. It was from a friend that l can only talk with if I’m drunk or in extremely great mood – cuz the conversation is always me, me and some more me.

Wife says to me aren’t you gonna answer the call?

I say “Not really in the mood”

Wife responds ‘Not answering calls is the douchiest (is this even a word?) thing l know that you do. If someone has taken the time to call, why don’t you just answer?”

So l tell her, “You got this all wrong, the telephone is for my convenience, not the callers. I pay extra each month for the convenience of call display so l can filter.”

Wife says ‘I still think its douchy. In fact your reasoning is douchy. So its double douchy. So what do you think you do is considered douchy?”

So before l responded, l thought of all the real douchy things l do but couldn’t tell her….

- getting text from wife saying how much she misses me and then responding likewise (but l wasn’t)

- getting text from wife saying ‘Thinking of you’ and then responding likewise (but I wasn’t thinking of her at that moment)

- I think l’m superior cuz l watch more intellectual movies and read deeper books than her

I thoughtfully considered my options and l went for the funny response. I said ‘The douchiest thing l do is l clean vagina! ‘

I thought it was funny but she didn’t. So l quickly came up with another answer that l thought would result in the least amount of person injury.

“I avoid coworkers on their last day to avoid awkward goodbyes”

She says ‘That is douchy”

So, what douchy things do you do?

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Filed under: Bob, Bob says, Funny, Hilarious, humor, life, life Bob rambling | 1 Comment »

What Your Child Should Be Reading: Part 3

Posted on June 28, 2011 by 7aki Fadi

It’s been a while since I posted one of these so I think it’s a good time to do that.

My first recommendation today which is good for 3 – 8 year olds is:

1) The Little Miss and The Mr. Men pocket books

These book are a delight, they are enjoyed by both little 7aki who is 7 and little Buddha who is 2.5.

It all started when little 7aki received two of these books as a present;  Little Miss Sunshine who can’t stop being happy and Little Miss Whoops who goes to visit her brother Mr. Bump and the rest was history. Now whenever I get a chance I get 2 or 3 of them at the used book store.

They are cute short reads and they talk about how people are different. You can for sure find one that best describes your kids.

Mine are:

Little Miss Stuborn would be my beoved buddha. Seriuosly stubborn.

… and Little Miss Brave/Naughty would be little 7aki. There is no Little Miss Brave! Not cool.

My second recommendation that is good for 3 – 7 year olds is:

2) The Pout-Pout Fish.

This book is really adorable; it’s about this pout-pout fish that would not smile even when all his friends ask him to until … well you have to read it to find out what turns his frown upside down.

He goes around spreading his dreary-wearies all over the place. Little 7aki loves to read this part.

And he goes blubing all over imaginable surfaces. This is little buddhas favorite; she traces the bluuuuub with her finger while she says it.

Good book, very clever rhyming, my kids love it.

And that’s it for today. Hopefully I won’t take this long for my next kids review.

_______________________________________________________________

For more of my kids reviews:

Part 1

Part 2

And for more other books go here

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Filed under: 7aki mish fadi, 7aki peanut, Book, Book Review, Books, Check these out, Childrens Books, Entertainment, fa3es, fiction, Little 7aki, Little Buddha | Leave a Comment »

Little 7aki: A Philosophical Question

Posted on June 20, 2011 by 7aki Fadi

There are under water statues in cancoon! Google it, so amazing.

I took the girls swimming this weekend. Little 7aki was drying herself after we got out of the water.

Little 7aki: Mama?

7aki: Yes.

Little 7aki: Are we wet when we are underwater?

7aki: haaaaa?

Little 7aki: I mean, when we come out of the water we are wet; but are we wet under water? I don’t think we are wet underwater.

7aki: Hmmmmm.

Little 7aki: Yeah, we are not wet because we are (while motioning all around her body with her hands)  surrounded by water but are not wet. But when you get out of the water you get wet!

7aki: Ah.. um … hmmmmm, that’s really interesting!

________________________________________

If a tree falls and no one hears it; did the tree really fall?

I am amazed that little 7aki was even thinking of this question and I had no clue what the answer was! So I went to my best friend google and  googled  it  and  you  would not believe how many ADULT people are asking this question.

The funniest answers I read:

holy shizzzcake i never thought of it that way.
dudeee!!
your like a genius O_o

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. That one really made me laugh out loud!

Yes you are wet…*bangs head on wall*…what drugs are you on? Can I have some?

Can I have some too?

WTF? are you stupid or something?

But IS the poster stupid?

Philosophically I would say , depends, the answer could be a yes or a no I quote one of the answers:

Wetness is only felt when there is an outer state of dryness to distinguish the presence of liquid on oneself.
…
You can’t distinguish dryness from wetness underwater not because the state of wetness does not exist but because the state of dryness does not exist. Take an analogy of the state of dreaming, when you are in a deep dream you sometimes can’t distinguish it from reality. That does not mean you are not dreaming. Similarly just because when you are underwater and the sensation is not the same when you get out of the water does not mean you were not wet underwater.

But scientifically I have no clue!

What do YOU think?

 

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Filed under: 7aki mish fadi, life changing, Little 7aki, Philosophy, thinking, Thought Provoking | Leave a Comment »

Overheard on Monday

Posted on June 13, 2011 by 7aki Fadi

7aki: I hate Monday.

Bob: Monday is an ass.

7aki: Eff Monday.

Bob: Monday should be shot.

7aki: Monday should be stabbed with a pencil.

Bob: I spit on Monday.

7aki: (Tottaly unbloggable, no seriously).

Bob: Monday is a whore ( HAHAHAHAHA, That’s too funny!).

7aki: You know who I want to stab? The music guy at Union station who plays the steel drum. ANNOYING.

Bob: I am sure the music guy wants to be stabbed.

7aki: I want to BOMB Monday. You know who else I want to stab? The weather guy, he said it’s going to be cold but it’s not and I have a light jacket on.

Bob: Monday traffic should be bleeeeep (totally unbloggable).

7aki: I just got into work and I want to stab (a co-worker who is annoying as hell, his indecision is just debilitating).

Bob: You’ll have to wait till 11 when he get’s in, lazy MOFO.

7aki: Monday is a bastard.

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7aki note: My apologies to asses, whores and bastards, you are totally better than Mondays.

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Filed under: Bob, Bob says, humor, Just Shoot Me, kill me now, MOFO BIB - BIB, Rant | Leave a Comment »

Overheard In the Bathroom. Potty Language Advisory

Posted on June 6, 2011 by 7aki Fadi

Buddha has been recently, VERY recently, potty trained; she’s been clean for 4 weeks now, I really need to share the experience with you, I am still MORTIFIED at how long it took her to grasp the concept,  maybe a post for some other time.

Due to her newly acquired skills, she is very excited to go to the bathroom, ESPECIALLY a public bathroom, can you please say EWWWWW?????

Yesterday we were invited to a kid friendly wedding, so we took the girls with, and in the span of three hours, no word of a lie,  Buddha asked to go to the bathroom about TWELVE times!!! WTF???

It might be  the foamy soap dispensers that lure her; our house does not provide already foamy soap, you have to actually RUB YOUR HANDS to make it foam. I can already tell that Buddha is high maintenance.

Or is it this Dyson hand dryer? OK guys this thing is OUT OF THIS WORLD!!! I am not even kidding you, I am positive this thing can launch a rocket that’s how powerful the air blast is. Buddha loves this thing! To be totally honest I love it too, hehehehe, it’s just so much FUN.  It’s like going to a bathroom theme park!!!!

But I digress; at her maybe 8th trip she flipped out because I flushed the toilet, HAHAHAHA, OMG it was so funny! I was in the stall with her and this is what happened:

7aki flushes the toilet. The toilet did not flush fully, toilet paper still in the toilet.

Buddha: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO, I FLUSH THE TOILET!

7aki: No no I did not flush; see there is still toilet paper.

Buddha: NOOOOOOOO, you flushed!

7aki: No no I swear LOOK, there is STILL toilet paper.

Buddha: NOOOOOO, you flush my pee! YOU FLUSH MY PEE!!!!

7aki now hears people outside the stall laughing, now I laugh myself; this is just so funny!

Is this what kids reduced us to??? Flush negotiators?

Now while I was resolving the flushing of the pee issue I hear someone peeing in the next stall and I kid you not people it sounded like someone was dumping a bucket of water in the toilet, HAHAHAHAA,  and it was just soooo loud, now little 7aki was in the next stall over and this is what happened:

little 7aki: WHAT IS THAT SOUND???

Now I am muffling my laugh because OMG what IS THAT sound?

Little 7aki: MAMA, WHAT IS THAT SOUND!

I mean little 7aki was loud. SUPER loud. I start giggling , I mean the pee sound is not only loud but this lady is still PEEING, it took her like 5 hours to finish. Maybe if I go there today I will still find her there emptying her bucket!

Little 7aki: WEIRD.

7aki (no longer able to contain myself): HAHAHAHAHAHA.

And this concludes me totally over-sharing today.

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Filed under: 7aki peanut, bizzaro land, ew, fa3es, family, Funny, Hilarious, humor, less-than-nothing, life, Little 7aki, Little Buddha | 2 Comments »

Urgent World Wide Search

Posted on June 4, 2011 by 7aki Fadi

I have lost something dear to me and I am announcing here on the internet in hopes that SOMEONE out there will find it.

I am so sad by this loss and honestly horrified at the idea of never finding it. Honestly I just want to cry right now.

When you have something that was with you since your teenage years and then suddenly you wake up one morning with no warning and it just …poof… disappears; it will mortify you.

Can you please help me by putting the word out there in hopes someone sees it?

I lost…

.

.

I lost …..

.

I lost my waist …. waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

WTF waist? Where the fuck did you go?  Seriously, this is NOT funny!

You think it’s sooooooooo funny that you just decided to just…DISAPPEAR!!!!!

Not cool and NOT FUNNY.

Is it the donuts that upset you? Those Tim Hortons Honey Crullers that I JUST discovered, seriously I have been in Canada for 10 years and I JUST discovered them, they are like a donut cloud that melts in your mouth. Is it because they are the most fattening donut Timmys has? IS IT? I will leave them if you promise to come back.

Or is it all those cotton candy I am having that they JUST STARTED selling at the store IN A BUCKET!!! Yes IN A BUCKET. Ahhhh, now that is just amazing.  IS IT? For you I will abandon them.

Or, or , please don’t say its the Chilli fries that I LOVE, please don’t let me leave them.. PLEAAAAAAAASE.  Are they? I will also leave them to win you back.

Waist, I miss you.

Do you know what happened since you left? I now sometimes have a little teeeeeeny tiny muffin top. WAAAAAAH.

Please come back (name that song).

Love you,

7aki’s muffin top.

PS:  They say the best part of the muffin is the top so if you decide not to come back then, psshhhhh, WHO NEEDS YOU.

PPS: Also, it seems my butt has transferred to my muffin top too, waaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

PPPS: NOT FUNNY!!!!!

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Filed under: Food, Funny, Have no clue how to categorize this, Hilarious, humor, Just Shoot Me, kill me now, less-than-nothing, life, life changing, me me me, ramble, random, Rant | 4 Comments »

Bridesmaids: The Movie

Posted on June 2, 2011 by 7aki Fadi

I have not laughed so hard at a movie theater for a very, very , very long time! So long in fact I actually don’t remember when.

The movie was well scripted, well cast and well directed.

I did not stop laughing throughout the whole movie;  you HAVE to go see it.  Its much funnier than hangover and I am NOT exaggerating.

Loved it.

 

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Filed under: Entertainment, Funny, Hilarious, humor, Movie, Movie Review | 2 Comments »

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  • This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.5 Canada License.

    This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.5 Canada License.

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